I`m a bloody genius, I am. I`ve written the plot of EastEnders for the next 15 years. Enjoy.
Dup dup duppaduppadup.
The Vic changes hands.
A wedding.
Scene directed by art student. Includes music by Coldplay, faded across scenes via various radios to deliver a sense of continuity.
New character arrives.
Phil starts drinking.
The Caff changes hands.
A murder.
The Vic changes hands.
The [...]